sung to the tune of I'm your man

If you want a cooler
I'll cool anything you ask me too
And if you want another kind of cool
I'll oscillate for you
And If you want a breeze just buy a fan
And If you want to be environmental
Here I stand
I'm your fan

And if you want to chill
I will step into the ring for you
And if you lie still
I'll blow wind on every inch of you
And if you want to blow hot air outside
then just turn me on my side
You know you can
Cause I'm your fan

Ah the rooms too hot
your clothes too tight
The beast won't go to sleep
you've been running through the BTU
of the efficient AC machines
But a girl never got her sanity back
Not by begging on her knees

I've sworn to you baby
that you wouldn't have to cave
And I've cooled your precious feet
I've blown air at your sweaty sad decay,
like a fucking roman slave

I've called at your heart
(saying please please, air-conditioners are inefficient, ineffectual cooling units)
and I've cooled off your sheets
I'm your fan

hee hee hee.

I just bought a fan per room (yeah) it feels great in here. Next thing clothe panels and climbing plants for the back porch. I think I may by one more because the sad bitter fan who is probably the author of the song above just died this morning.

Why is Gmailing sucking so large these days.